I am a scientist by nature and culture. I come from a culture that is mostly analytical and constantly searches to improve things. Some believe it's a left brain dominance. As a result of this trait, I was generally hypercritical of events and people around me. Who was affected the most? Myself! How? Anything that had to do with my emotion and right brain was a challenge. I lost many close friendships and rarely developed long-term relationships because of my expectations of how it was supposed to be. I was constantly in search of finding the right way, right words, right friends, right work that I missed what was the "right" thing costed me.
I saw more wrong than right!
Did it benefit me? Sometimes yes! I was a great scientist. With less than a decade in science, I authored and co-authored 7 publications in different journals and was greatly appreciated as a bench biologist. I was great at what I did… That was when I was paired with the “right” person. A scientist who was authentic, trustworthy and knowledgeable. One who was kind and generous and could openly communicate his thoughts. I was lucky to find them and that was GREAT! But in reality how lucky should you be to only work with such people?
Really lucky! My life took a turn when my boss left. As a result of some internal changes, I was paired with someone who went against many of my shoulds and challenged most of my values. So I quit in an agonizing 8 months!
Now, almost 2 years later, I see the whole scenario differently!
Balancing right and left brain: Since then, I came a long way finding ways to separate analyzing data and judging people for who they are.
Developing acceptance: I appreciate differences as opportunities for building my strength. I only see people for where they are at and observe keenly to find out where they aspire to go and if along the way we can help each other. If we are different, so be it!
Self-awareness: I continually search to find the values that are important to me and what is being challenged at a given time.
Trust: I trust myself and my intuition to guide me more often.
All is because of that one unfit manager!
So in the weirdest way… I am Thankful to him!
Leaving my unfit boss, shook me to use my right mind more often! Knowing what I know now, I would have left in less than a month with less pain and more peace.
Sometimes it's important to ditch your left brain and trust your intuition. To see the signs and say to yourself I am done. Regardless of your decisions' implications run for your sanity, your peace, and ultimately your confidence. To not judge the other person or yourself because more often than not, that doesn’t help. IT’S NOT YOU and IT'S NOT THEM! It's just not a fit. At least currently! We are all constantly evolving so no-one can predict what would it be in future...
Result of using my right brain:
How did taping in my right brain and using my emotions help me? I love deeper, talk more often, have deeper relationships, most importantly I am more peaceful with who am I and am more confident! I now choose when to tap into my analytical side or when to use my emotions... I seek for an opportunity in every challenge! I am positive and upbeat instead of being judgmental and critical.
If you are currently being challenged by your analytical side, take a moment and think about What your current mindset is costing you? How balancing your left brain with your right might help you leading yourself and others?
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by: Mehran Sorourian